Sunday, December 20, 2009

Happy Birthday, Happy Anniversary

Today is my 40th birthday! It's also the second anniversary of the day I began this blog. It is a good day for some reflection on how things have changed in the past year or two, and I'm filled with gratitude for so many things in my life.

Here is where I was one year ago today.

Here is my first post, two years ago today.

Since last year, I've begun teaching Reiki locally in two different wellness centers here in the Cleveland area, in addition to launching my website, and connecting with many new friends and students on Twitter and Facebook. I was interviewed about Reiki on four different radio shows. I've started writing about Reiki for and I've had the blessing of teaching at least 150 more students in the past year as well. Reiki teaching is becoming a more central focus in my life, and it feels really right. It's wonderful to feel that things are moving in this direction and I look forward to what will be developing in the year to come.

I'm so grateful for the opportunities that have been opening for me, for those who have connected with me to learn and receive Reiki, and for the awesome support of my husband and family, which is continuous. I am filled with love and gratitude within and feel it surrounding me. It's a great way to begin this milestone year of my life.

Thank you for reading my blog, and for commenting. All of you are appreciated and I send love and light to you all.


Thursday, December 10, 2009

Inspiration from Angels

Something new I've done recently is to write for a new book called One Page Wisdom: Book One - Inspirational One-Page Writings from 111 People Worldwide. I have a story in there, as one of the 111 authors. The book is now published, in paperback, and it's available here as well as Amazon, etc. What I like about it is that you can turn to any page in the book and it feels like you are reading a message meant for you right at this very moment. Lots of people wrote about what inspires them, and there are themes of spirituality, faith, miracles, blessings, gratitude, love, and more. I'm really happy to be a part of it. I think the book makes a good gift too, and I plan to get some to give out as holiday presents this year.

It got me thinking about sources of inspiration. I've read that one can receive messages from angels in various forms - snippets of music on the radio or suddenly going through your head, words on a bumper sticker of the car in front of you, an animal crossing your path or showing up in your yard, or turning to a page in a book and finding that the words say just what you needed to hear. Is this real, or is it our attempt to make meaning from seemingly random events? Hard to say concretely, but those who believe and take the messages to heart certainly feel inspired.

I will admit that I've had some events like this happen to me. The coincidences seem to be perfectly timed, you know? (The response is: there are no coincidences. Right.) For instance, one day I was driving and I was feeling rather confused wondering about my own intuitive development. I asked the angels to please show me a sign that I'm on the right path, that they really are with me. Two minutes later, a car was driving in front of me with a bumper sticker that had small lettering. Curious, I pulled up closer. It said "Believe."

Another time, I was sitting at my computer, feeling the same sort of way, doubting myself, feeling frustrated, wondering what to do. I asked the angels to show me a sign that I was doing what I should be, and an email popped up in my inbox right at that moment. It said "Healing Angels has requested you as a friend on Facebook." I cried, feeling overwhelmed.

Are these things really signs? Well, they could be. Angel experts like Doreen Virtue say that this is how angels communicate with us. I'm open to the idea that messages for me could be there waiting for me to notice, offering guidance, reassurance and love. It's a comforting thought, and I also think that taking the leap of faith required to receive and accept these messages could be a good thing. It makes one open to receiving more, and that's part of intuitive development growth.

As I write this, I feel tingles on my face. That's the sensation that I associate with angels and guidance with me when I'm sending Reiki or giving attunements. When I ask for angelic assistance, I feel tingles and light sensations on my face. It's like a light caress saying, "We're here helping you." I've come to believe this is another way I receive validation that the angels are with me. As a sentient person (one who experiences energy through sensations), this is important to me. I've learned to interpret various nuances in tingles in my hands and face while sending Reiki as indicators of places where the recipient needs more energy, or has certain physical issues such as pain. When I ask for angelic assistance, I often feel this sensation on my face in response.

So I've decided to be open to angelic guidance in all forms, and leave doubts in the background. Why not see what will happen? It couldn't hurt, and it could open me to receiving more of what I'm looking for - intuitive growth, connection with inspiration and guidance.

I invite comments on your intuitive experiences with receiving guidance.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

A Grateful Thanksgiving

Hello and Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!

I am extremely thankful, especially today, to share the wonderful news that my husband has received and accepted a job offer. The long period of unemployment is coming to a close as he assumes the role of Operations Analyst at Lutheran Hospital, which is in Cleveland, near where we live. So we are not moving out of state, and we can keep our roots here for the time being. Interesting to note is that there are still some out of state opportunities brewing for him and he may have other offers coming in the next few months. All will be considered, so this might be a step rather than a stop, so to speak! Still, we are very happy to be able to share such wonderful news that he can go back to work, in a position that can help him grow and further his career goals.
So, Evan landing a job is at the #1 spot on the Thanksgiving Thankful List for today. Here are the next items.

I am thankful for Evan. He has handled his time of uncertainty, waiting, stress, and anxiety with amazing strength and perseverance. He has taken on lots of cooking, cleaning, laundry, home repairs, and dad time, and cleared the way for me to apply myself to working on writing, lining up teaching opportunities, and teaching. We also enjoyed some extra time together that we wouldn't have had otherwise, even grocery shopping together became a sort of "date." He never wallowed in misery, but held me up when I needed it. I'm in awe, admiration, and appreciation of him and look at him with overwhelming love and gratitude.

I am thankful for our four children. They bring laughter, energy, love, challenges, and fun to our home on a daily basis. Each of them is an individual with a strong personality, amazing talents, and they make our family abundant in reasons for gratitude.

I am thankful for my parents and mother-in-law, who have given us emotional and financial support when we needed it, and have been constantly encouraging us to hang in there.

I am thankful for my friends on Twitter, Owning Pink, and Facebook who have never stopped giving encouragement, sending Reiki, prayers, and good thoughts our way with each interview and throughout the waiting process that seemed never-ending.

I am thankful for my Reiki students, who have given me the opportunity to share this beautiful and empowering energy with them. Teaching Reiki is my life path, and every person who allows me to show them how to experience Reiki is a blessing to my life.

I am thankful for a warm home, nourishing food, cars that are running, a good internet connection, and the ability to learn to live frugally (a skill which will continue to serve us well).

I'm also thankful for the ability to connect with angels, life force energy, and the constant reassurance that this has provided me when I needed it.

Finally, I'm thankful for those who take the time to read my thoughts here, whether you comment or not, please know I'm glad to have your caring and interest.

Blessings, Gratitude and a Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Being Tested

This is a trying time for my family and me. My husband has interviewed for jobs and is waiting for answers. There are many delays. He has another interview coming next week. The days are strange and long as we wait for emails and phone calls. I feel as if I'm being tested to see if I can learn patience.

I had a powerful energy healing session last night from my friends Candy & Ming who reported afterward that I'm standing in between two doors, holding on to both, and neither of them can open. I have to let go and stop blocking them so the right one can open. Surrender - it's a lesson I'm trying to learn to do.

Of course, I know that I have been anxious over what will happen. We might move, we might stay. The delays are long and trying. So knowing that surrender is needed is different from actually knowing how to make it happen. And there's something amusing about what I just said: making surrender happen. As if it's something that can be forced - that's the opposite of surrender! Even talking about it is difficult to do in terms that make sense.

Knowing what needs to happen is the first step towards doing it. I know that. Now... how to do it. Here's what I am going to try:
  • conscious breathing - I'm going to take a few minutes, several times during the day, to stop, breathe slowly, and be present. It's a mini-meditation moment.

  • asking for help - I'm going to ask my angels and guides for help in arranging things for the best good of our family - not once, but at least daily. That will help me remember that I've given the process over to those who can make it happen.

  • catching my monkey mind - When I feel myself slipping into the "what if" state of mind, trying to figure out what I would do in any variation of the possible scenarios, I'll stop, and go to that peaceful place by breathing, and remember that I'm letting the angels handle things.
That's the plan. I'll keep you posted on how it works. Feel free to offer suggestions and encouragement!


Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Teaching in Person

I've been teaching local Reiki classes for the first time this month, and tonight my Kundalini Reiki class of eight wonderful students will receive their final attunement. I'm also teaching Reiki for Parents, and it's going very well.

I was nervous at the start, because all of my Reiki teaching, with the exception of one-on-one classes, has been remotely via my website. There have been over 200 students in the past year and a half, and that's a lot! I am confident and absolutely adore teaching Reiki. But facing a class full of people in a room was somehow a little daunting to me. It's funny too, because I'm a teacher, and have been teaching kids and teens various subjects for over 13 years. But a room full of adults? That felt different!

I took a leap. I trusted that all would be well, and that my teaching ability and passion for Reiki would support me in helping everyone understand and feel the energy. I had to decide how I would attune everyone, since I knew I could do it all at once by simple intention. Instead, I decided I would pass along the attunements individually to everyone in class (I touched each person on the shoulders, intending for him or her to be attuned as he or she intended to accept the attunement). Then I moved to the next person, and at the end, I sat at the table and felt the energy flowing between my hands as it continued working. After about 20 minutes, everyone opened up their eyes, having felt the attunement energy reach completion. Kundalini Reiki attunements don't have the ritualized aspects of Usui Reiki attunements, so no more is needed than simple intention for passing the attunements along. Once everyone had opened their eyes, each person spoke of his or her experience, and each person's was unique and yet powerful. I can't express how grateful I am for the ability to help open people to Reiki energy and that it works every time.

Everyone returned the next week with stories about helping other people with Reiki, or their pets, and one person even saw his plant improve after he gave it Reiki! Some of them had sent distance healing, and it was felt and the recipient felt better. It was really exciting to see how they had all started realizing the benefits of Reiki, and experienced the results for themselves.

Some of my students have been in touch with me via email in between classes, with questions, or to share their excitement about the power of Reiki. I love hearing from them.

So this has been a wonderful experience for me as well, and a learning experience too. I learned that I am capable of facing a class full of students, and giving the information about Reiki clearly, as well as passing on attunements in person. I learned that I can share my passion for teaching Reiki in person as well as via email, and it's equally well received. I shed my anxiety over teaching adults, and feel much more confident now.

I look forward to more opportunities to teach local Reiki classes and more distance students as well. I truly believe that everyone should learn Reiki because there are so many benefits and we all have this power inside us to tap into for our own healing and wellness. I am blessed and so very grateful for the opportunity to work with each person that gives me the chance.


Saturday, October 17, 2009


A few months back, I was approached by a woman who I had met on Twitter, Debbie Wilker. She had been suddenly diagnosed with cancer and wanted to learn Reiki. I chatted with her about it, and although she didn't have the money to pay for attunements, I attuned her to Kundalini Reiki through master level. I also put her in touch with my friend Bridget, who had healed her own cancer with energy healing and diet, and works with people diagnosed with cancer. Debbie had high hopes for beating this disease and was determined to stay positive and do all she could.

Debbie had a rare and aggressive form of cancer. I wanted to help her and had high hopes for her recovery because she was so driven to live. Debbie was 52 when she was diagnosed. She was an artist, author, mom, wife, and coach. Yes, I am speaking in the past tense. Debbie died three days ago. I found out today.

She had been in touch with me many times, each time telling me about her energy experiences with self healing, dreams, and asking questions about Reiki. I sent her Reiki healing many times. She was receiving help from many energy healers, and following lots of advice. She was also receiving conventional medical treatment. She was in and out of the hospital, and then hospice care.

I'm blogging about this today because Debbie's passing is in my thoughts. I know she wanted to live longer, that she didn't feel finished with her life's work. Being connected to a higher source of energy through Reiki is helpful, but it can't change the inevitability of an aggressive cancer, I guess. I'm sad over this, and it's a cold reminder that there are things we don't understand about life and death, no matter how strong our intentions to help ourselves or each other. I'm sure Debbie is at peace now, but her passing is hard for her family and friends. We know that she wanted to live longer, free of pain and disease, and able to continue with her plans. We miss her.

When people die before they have had their full lives, such as children, young mothers, or people in their prime, it can seem to be senseless. Why did this happen? It feels unfair and wrong. Some people try to explain it, but there are no explanations that satisfy those of us who feel no sense of understanding behind it. "God's ways are mysterious." "God has her reasons." Yada yada yada. Meanwhile, there is a great loss for those left behind, and leaves the nagging feeling that a life was cut short. It's sobering, and a reminder that we are all vulnerable in our own way too. Life is unpredictable and death is inevitable. It may not be the end, because our spirits are eternal, but each lifetime is precious and has something to accomplish and experiences to live. When it feels like one didn't get the full measure of this lifetime, it is confusing and hurts. I know I'm not the one to judge whether someone had their full lifetime or not, for what do I know anyway? But I know that Debbie didn't feel finished, and that is hard. I know she made peace with her dying at the end, and was more concerned for her family, because she emailed me about that. But the question of "why now" remains unanswered.

People in Debbie's life may still feel her presence, and she may still be around in spirit. Perhaps she will visit her husband and son in their dreams or visions. I hope that she can, and it will bring them comfort.

The medical profession has a long way to go with curing cancer, and the current treatment is painful and difficult for those who have it. One day I hope there will be better answers.

I wish I could have done more to make a difference.


Thursday, October 8, 2009

How to Surrender

I've noticed lately that many people are blogging and tweeting about surrender. What is surrender, though? Is it giving up? Is it shrugging your shoulders and admitting that we have no control over the events which will come at us moment by moment? Is it having faith? All of these options sound difficult from where I'm standing, and some of them don't sound like a good way to live.

Let's talk about the first thing I mentioned - giving up. That couldn't be a good thing. It implies a feeling of hopelessness - like there's nothing I can do so why try? If one who is without a job gives up, there is no job search, there is just wallowing in misery. I don't think this is the way to go.

Then there's the "shrugging one's shoulders and admitting one isn't in control" method. Saying "this is out of my hands" is difficult for one who likes to make things happen with action. But there comes a time when one has done all she can and the rest is waiting. I think when one gets to this point, it takes patience to get through it. Patience is my lesson these days, and the Universe is handing me abundant opportunities to practice. Is this a good form of surrender? Well, I think it's part of the process, so whether it's good or bad to shrug and give in, it is probably necessary.

So then there's having faith. This is the next step, after shrugging, I think. This is the part for me takes a lot of effort, but many people advocate this. Just believe that everything will turn out for the best. The Universe, Source, Powers that Be, has your best interest in mind and is steering the world in the right direction for you. Things will work out. That's a common phrase people say to reassure themselves when things seem out of their hands. How does one go about having faith? Is it a decision? Is it an effort? I think that for me, it's both.

Deciding that I'll take the attitude of "I've done all I can, so now I'll wait" is part of it. The rest is letting go of worry that things will go this way or that way, or not work out after all the effort put in. That's the faith part, and it's also surrender in action. The act of surrender is giving up the worry - just letting it go and staying in this moment, not the place of "what if."

It's easy for me to think of all of the possible outcomes of the situation and what I would do to handle each. That's the control freak in me, I think. It also puts me in a place of anxious waiting, rather than calm. One would think that planning for every possible outcome would make me feel secure, and I know that's why I try to do it. But actually, it makes me live on the edge of my seat, waiting to see which outcome seems to be materializing so I can jump into action.

Things in my life have been in flux lately as my husband attends some important job interviews which may lead to us moving out of state. Moving is a big deal, as I've mentioned, but I'm not against the idea. It just involves rising to the occasion and taking care of a lot of details, including a period of time where my husband would move ahead of us and I'd be in charge of all of our day to day business with the kids, school, meals, cleaning, and selling the house. Breathe, Alice, breathe! Okay, I'm breathing.

So this idea of "surrender" is a tough one for me, as is patience, while we wait to see what will transpire. It's good - getting a job is a good thing - for sure. But it's also possible to get lost in the details, and the wondering how we'll manage to accomplish it. I reassure myself that people do this, even with big families such as ours, and we can too. That's a kind of faith/ surrender too I suppose.

There is also Reiki. Of course, Reiki! I can send Reiki to the intention for the best possible outcome for our family, and knowing that positive energy is flowing in that direction is reassuring in itself. In fact, the more I do this, the more I feel I'm doing something that makes a difference, and that feels pretty good.

I'm breathing, grounding, and doing all I can to stay in the moment instead of going to that place of "what if" and "how will I do such-and-such" and man, what an effort! I never knew surrender could be so much work. Nobody talks about how much work surrender actually is, and instead people say that they make the decision to "let it go" and poof! they feel so much better instantly. For me, it's a process. I constantly remind myself to breathe. I often bring myself back to the present. It's an ongoing thing. My mind is like a toddler who is intent on having her way. I have to be the mom who goes over and repeatedly picks her up and brings her back to this room. Then a few seconds later, off she goes again!

But I know also that there is an end in sight. There will be a decision, a resolution, soon, and I'll be able to make lists of what needs to be done and get organized. In many ways, that will be a relief. In others, it will be overwhelming. For now, the list has one thing on it: wait. That in itself is hard enough. Later, the list will have many things, but at the end of the day, whatever I've gotten done is progress, and I can be okay with that.

So this blog post is about How to Surrender, and the recipe includes shrugs, faith, breathing, Reiki, and of course, patience. No surprises there, right? Tell me something, is surrender a struggle for you too? Do you have a different recipe?


Saturday, September 26, 2009

Be Here Now

There is always, it seems, a balance to be mindfully walked. Balance between action and patience, balance between faith and action, balance between surrender and preparing. They are all related, and all a part of my life lately. The tough part is deciding how much of each to put into the mix for the right amount. I think the right amount is achieved when one feels at peace, knowing that one has done what is necessary and then is able to surrender the outcome to the Powers That Be, the Universe, God, Spirit, Source, whatever one chooses to name the Divine power in his or her life.

Finding that balance can feel like walking a tightrope. I truly think that the feeling of being at peace is the answer to whether one has accomplished it. I struggle often to get to that, as I think many do. But it's worth it, because life is much easier in those moments when one has that sense of being centered, calm through the stress, not affected by the anxiety that could be crushing.

In my life lately, there is the direct challenge of putting this into practice. My husband is going to be on his way to Virginia at the end of next week for a final job interview in person at a hospital. This is a great opportunity for him, and it means a huge change for our family should he accept an offer from them. I support him being in a great job, wherever it takes us. There are many things that we would need to do in order to make it happen, and we could get swallowed by the to do list and freak out. I have decided not to do that. We are waiting until he has an offer, and then will sit and calmly make that long, long list, and get started one thing at a time until we are there.

And also, if he doesn't get this job for some reason, another will certainly work out for him. He has other interviews lined up, and many applications in, and things are beginning to happen from those. The unknown factors and ongoing money issues are enough to cause hyperventilation, but deciding not to go there, to instead live in THIS MOMENT NOW, have been the answer to enjoying life so much more.

Living in the now - this moment - not in "what if" or "but it might not" or "what are we gonna do" land - is the key to being open for the opportunities to present themselves. It is the way to deal with everything while avoiding anxiety, and staying balanced. Breathing, and being aware of the spaces between the breaths, helps me remember that I'm here, now, and not in my head worrying about everything. I don't have control over whether this job offer will come. I only have control over what I'm doing right now, this moment.

It doesn't mean being inactive or giving up. It means doing what you can, one thing at a time, and not worrying over what's next, down the road, what might happen, what might not happen, or over-planning. I have consciously chosen to live in the present, and it does take effort, but little by little I'm doing it. The benefits are tangible. I used to be very anxious, a worrier. Now I'm moving out of that mindset and feeling more able to enjoy things.

I'm enjoying playing with my kids, talking with my husband, and getting my work done. I'm sure more benefits will realize themselves as I bring presence more and more into being.

Try it with me. Several times a day, stop and focus on 10 breaths. Just be tuned in to your breathing, and count each one if you want. Observe how it makes you feel when you return to what you are doing. It's basically a mini-meditation that you can do several times a day, which brings you to the present moment, and calms the mental chatter. While you're breathing, try to take full breaths - from deep down in your abdomen. Many of us breathe shallowly throughout the day. A full breath is cleansing, and increases circulation and oxygen flow to the brain. It's good for us.

I know that there are big changes ahead for my family, and I'm ready. I've put out there that I want the best thing for our family to happen, the best opportunity for Evan to be his. Now I'm allowing the Universe to make it happen, and doing those things which I can do now, one at a time.

Reiki helps me also with this. When I am sending a healing, attunement, or doing self healing, I am only focused on the energy flowing, and it brings me to the present. It is centering and balancing, and feels wonderful. I think that everyone should have Reiki in their life as a tool for self-awareness, healing, and helping others. Everyone is capable of learning to connect with Reiki, and I am blessed to have the ability to teach people of all ages how to access Reiki energy. It is easy to learn and instantly available. If you'd like to know more, please click here to go to my website.

As for the next developments, I'll keep you posted. Thanks for hanging in there with me.


Friday, September 11, 2009

Pressing "Pause"

I wrote last week about waiting. My life lately has been a process of waiting. This is especially true, you know, because my husband has been looking for work. Lately, things are happening for him - he has 3 interviews coming up this week - but it's still a process of waiting. We know that despite the interviews, we won't know if he has a job for a while yet. Two of the interviews are first interviews, and one is a third interview out of town. That last one is an amazing opportunity, but would involve us moving 300 miles away, selling our house, and starting anew. I'm not opposed to the change, in fact I find the idea exciting, but the reality of getting the house repairs done, stuff cleared out, putting the house on the market, and all of the details involved are rather overwhelming. All of the constant stream of "what will we do if" and "when will we know?" circling around my thoughts gets tiring and, I realize, isn't productive.

I'm a planner by nature. I like to be as prepared as possible, thinking that if I can figure out what I'll do in any given situation that could arise that I'll feel more confident and ready. It's intellectually satisfying in the moment, but I also know that no one can really predict the details and be prepared for each one. So the constant churning of thoughts, scenarios, arrangements, and ideas is actually just burning energy.

I need to pause.
I need to breathe. I need to visualize the outcome I would like and just sit quietly with that in mind, sending energy to it. I admit that I have not been able to stop myself long enough to do this. But I will. I really will, because I know that is the way to help all of this. It's the way to help myself stop cycling through the constant barrage of "what if's" and help manifest the best possible outcome.

A good friend and inspiring person,
Lissa Rankin, leader and founder of one of my favorite websites,, said in one of her posts just to ask the Universe to send you inner peace, then surrender to the outcome, knowing that all will be arranged with the best outcome for you, whatever it may be. Sometimes it may be surprising, unexpected, or feel like it's taking your life in a new direction. But trusting that all is working out as it should is a sure way of quieting that nagging constant stream of thoughts trying to prepare for every outcome. That kind of surrender to a blank slate outcome involves an extra step of inner quiet, and requires having presence in the moment - something else I'm trying to become more consciously connected to. Thank you, Lissa!

So today's post is a reminder to myself, and a reminder to any of you lovely readers who might need it along with me - let's pause. Breathe. Ask for the outcome that will bring inner peace. Things will all line up and work out for the best.


Wednesday, September 2, 2009


I finished writing my first novel recently. This is a big accomplishment because after I started it and wrote the first 130 pages, it sat in my computer, unfinished, for a year and a half. I just didn't have time or creative energy to get back to it, until the end of this summer. Now I have.

It's not about Reiki. What? On my Reiki blog I'm posting about something not Reiki related? Wait, (ha! you have to wait!) I'll get to the point eventually.

I started it as a blog, creative writing outlet, and it's actually biblical fiction on the story of Adam & Eve and their experience as parents. I studied the story a lot during my graduate program, and always had a fascination for how much is left unsaid in the biblical account of the first family. I mean, you see nothing of Adam & Eve's experiences as parents, nothing of how their kids were as kids, and don't get to find out anything about the family dynamics or what happened when they discovered Abel dead and Cain gone, etc. So I started writing little character monologues one day, and continuing the story from different character's points of view, and after a while my blog posts were getting 300 hits and 25 comments. The blog server failed, and luckily I had backed up my posts, so I put them together and worked on continuing the story as a novel. It was a great creative outlet for me and fun.

So I finished it, and it turns out that it's a little too short to be a novel. It's a novella. So here I have a biblical fiction novella - not an easy thing to market. I started querying agents and publishers, and have begun collecting rejection letters.

But last night I received one email expressing interest in reading some. An e-publisher asked for a partial - that means 50 pages - in response to my query. I sent it off, hoping that they will come back and ask for the rest. The story really grows as it continues, even past the first 50 pages, and the character development does too. I kinda wish I could send the last 50 pages, you know?

This process, along with everything else in my life lately (i.e. my husband's ongoing job search, my Reiki class offerings waiting for registration), seems to be an exercise in patience and surrender. I've sent the pages off. Now I wait again. My husband has sent his applications in, and had some phone interviews even. He waits for the phone to ring. I've set up my Reiki class offerings. Now I wait for people to register. AAAGHH! Breathe, breathe, breathe.

Feels like it's all about waiting. I know logically that it's better to do what you can to enjoy the present moment than to be focused on what is coming down the pike. I mean, my hubby was home all summer, and we did lots of family things. Yesterday was our 13th wedding anniversary and we went out to lunch while the kids were at school. We'll take our youngest to the playground in a little while to let her run and play in the sunshine. All should be lovely, right?

But how do you get your thoughts to stop wondering what's going to happen and when? How do I stop the constant wondering when the phone will ring, when my email will come in, and when things will stabilize in my life? Chances are, there will always be something coming next - something to be waiting for - and if I don't get this wondering and waiting in check I'll never be able to live in the moment and truly enjoy it.

I'm always wondering how to stop the noise.

I'm going to work on meditation more - make time to incorporate it into my daily life because that's what I would tell my students if they present this same issue to me. Stop, I would tell them, take time and tune in and quiet the noise. I need to follow this. I know it. Blogging here about it has helped me focus on an answer. Sometimes just the act of sitting and writing can help because I'm just letting the words flow. Okay. I have a plan. I'm going to go and meditate.

Ahhh. I think I feel better already.


Sunday, August 23, 2009

So Much to Learn, Where to Turn?

I've been thinking lately of all the things I want to learn to help myself grow. There's a lot. And it feels a little overwhelming, actually, knowing there are so many choices and I only have a little bit of time these days to spend on reading.

I'm reading Ekhart Tolle's A New Earth which is truly enlightening and transformative. I can only read a little at a time, though, because it's a lot to digest. I'm taking away the idea that facing the aspects of one's personality that comprise the ego - recognizing them as an observer - is a means to removing oneself from being driven by them. It's really fascinating and I recommend this book to anyone interested in looking at one's life with a discerning eye.

I also want to learn to read Tarot. I have a set of cards, and a book about it, but haven't yet gotten far enough to attempt to try to understand one card from another.

A close friend is studying Huna, and what he's shared with me has ignited my interest in this Hawaiian healing art and philosophy. So I want to learn more about it, and feel pulled in that direction.

I also want to lend more time (or even some) each day to meditation and self healing. I don't do enough of this, and I know it would benefit me very much in the areas of energy clearing and intuitive growth.

I feel torn between these things and the minimal time I have to devote to any of it, and wonder which would be the best thing to concentrate on. It can feel overwhelming. I guess the best thing is to finish one at a time. Growth can't be rushed, which is probably the biggest message in all of this process....

Patience. That's what I always need to remind myself at times like this. I need to have patience. The time will present itself to learn what I need to learn. I wish sometimes that I could stop the rest of my life and just focus on all of these things at once, but it doesn't work that way. I have a hunger for knowledge and growth that doesn't like to be patient. But I need to.

I suppose all will balance and in time I'll get to everything. Most likely more things I want to learn and do will come along as I'm getting from one thing to the next. It's a growing list, but that's okay. It's good to have new things to learn and more waiting. Growth is a continuous process. So is patience, apparently!

Patience is something I really need these days for other aspects of my life. Since the end of April, my husband has been searching for a job. The search continues, and we remain positive that something will happen soon. Patience. Also, I'm starting to query book agents and publishers with my novel, which I just finished. Now I wait for responses. Patience again. I'm waiting to find out if the enrollment will be high enough for my Reiki courses to be held. Patience. It's not a word I like very much, and it's never been easy for me, but what makes patience possible is trust.

I have decided to have trust that things will all work out as they should. Whether my husband will get a job here, in VA, or in Utah, things will work out. Maybe we'll stay and maybe we'll sell the house and move. Whatever happens, it will be for the best, and I trust the Universe, the Powers That Be, Source, the Angels, whatever, that the best interests of my family will be arranged. It is this trust that helps me have patience.

Some people would call it "faith." Maybe trust and faith are the same thing. I am not sure. I've never considered myself a "person of faith." Trust seems to be easier - just telling myself that it's all going to be fine has a calming effect.

Then there's "surrender." That is also a kind of trust - just saying that I'm going to just BE in the moment and not worry about what could happen. Just dealing with today - the now - is part of what I've been learning from Tolle's book. It takes practice, because I find that planning gives me a sense of security. And sometimes I find myself trying to plan for many different scenarios, and I get caught up in the "what-if's" before I know it.

Patience, trust, surrender - these are the lessons I'm working on. Who knew that deciding what to read next could get me here?


Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Protecting Your Energy

I learned something, (applause, please!) and when I learn something, the first thing I want to do is to share it. (It is the teacher in me that drives me!) I am hoping that this lesson is something that will help someone avoid what happened to me.

I'm relatively new to energy work, even though it's a part of each and every day for me. I do lots of attunements, advising and teaching. I blog about it, and think about it often, pondering how I can get the message about the amazing power we all have inside us out to more people.

My day to day life and Reiki practice both involve more giving than receiving. I know this, and it's something I know I need to pay more mindful attention to in order to restore the balance.

Before giving a healing or attunement, I first ask my Guides and Angels for protection and support. I feel the energy and their presences around me before I begin, and it feels good, grounding, and helps me feel ready. After the session, I thank them. I also do my best to keep my mindful attention on the flow of the energy rather than let my mind wander. Being in the moment is part of my practice, and it still takes a little effort, but it's becoming more natural. This feels right to me, and has been a good practice.

I recently learned about grounding, and posted about its importance and benefits. Today I'm going to talk about protecting your energy.

I never knew about the importance of doing this all the time, but apparently for energy workers and anyone who raises their energy to a higher vibration (through meditation for example), it is an essential practice. Having energy that is big and flowing outward apparently has the ability to attract entities and manifestations. Interacting with others for attunements and healings can make one similarly vulnerable. What are entities and manifestations? Basically, as I understand it, they are energy thought forms which take on a life of their own, and attach themselves to one's energy, causing blockages or damage. Some can be malevolent, as I found out first hand early this morning.

Here's what happened.

I was asleep. It was 5:45 am. I awoke suddenly, feeling as if a heavy energy was weighing on my head and chest, smothering me. I could breathe, but this felt wrong. I didn't know why it was happening and I asked for angelic support from Archangel Michael, to help get this energy off me. I felt it continue, weighing heavily, for 15 minutes. Suddenly, it released. I looked at my watch. It was 6 am. I lay in bed, wondering what had happened, and suddenly at 6:15, it started again. The sensation was more powerful this time, feeling like a big pillow being pushed on my face and chest. I tossed in bed, but it continued. I asked again for Archangel Michael and my angels to please fight it off, and I felt a struggle going on. In 15 minutes, it was over again, and I was shaken, but felt released. I realized I have been the victim of a psychic attack.

When I got up, I told my friend and amazing healer, Sophie Lhoste, what had happened. She checked into my energy, verified that I had been attacked, and said that it was related to the attunements I did at the summer camp last week. Something that had felt displaced had come after me. She reiterated the importance of protecting my energy all the time, and said I need to learn to do that. As an energy worker, I am vulnerable to outside energies and must be mindful of cleansing my energy and protecting it.

So how does one protect oneself? There are a number of ways:
  • cleanse the room. Here is a great guide for ways to do this, from my friend Alana's website.
  • ask for help. Ask for the angels to protect your energy, placing a shield around you. You can also ask them to guard your home, bedroom, wherever, before going to sleep at night, or whenever you feel vulnerable.
  • cleanse your energy. Do daily self healings such as Etheric Cord Flush, and ground your energy many times a day.
  • visualization techniques. You can imagine yourself protected in a bubble of white light, golden light, or a blue cloak of protection. I am going to use this at the beginning of each day and before bed.
  • crystals & stones. I carry energy charged stones with me during the day, and I am going to charge some with the intention for "protection" and add them to my collection. Tiger's Eye is a stone that is known to be good for this, as is quartz.
Stay tuned, also. Because Sophie is going to host a 50 minute teleclass on Psychic Protection, and she's sure to give more very important methods of how we can all protect our energies from negative influences. The class is going to be on Thursday, August 27, at 9 pm Eastern Standard Time. The fee for the call is $25 and I'll be there too, learning these important techniques with you. Sophie is an amazing teacher, healer and resource, so I hope you'll take this opportunity to join us on the call. Click the button to sign-up.

I urge you to try these methods and start today to make them a part of your daily practice. If you work with energy, or you're around people with negative energy, protecting yourself can keep you from absorbing negativity that can affect you. So learn from my mistakes, and know that I am sharing this with you to help protect you as well. We're all in this together! Energy connects us all.

Let me know how it goes for you, and I hope you'll join us on the call.

Peace and light.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

The Lessons of the Summer

After a couple very slow weeks, things have started happening. I'm happy to welcome some new students - Kundalini Reiki students and Energy Healing Mentoring Program students. I also did some searching for places to teach Reiki in my local area and came up with a few possibilities, which I pursued. There have been some promising results!

I did a search for "holistic" in my area. Why I didn't think to do that before is anyone's guess. I found a wellness center that was hosting a holistic day camp. "How cool!" I thought. I called the contact number and left a message saying that I am looking for opportunities to teach Reiki for Parents and other Reiki courses and would like to talk about collaborating. Someone called me back right away (on Friday), and offered me the chance to teach Reiki for Kids at the holistic day camp which was coming up the following week. Great timing! I followed up with the appropriate people and found myself attuning 10 kids to Usui Reiki level 1 on Tuesday morning. I created the class for the kids, taught it, and attuned each child in turn. It was really wonderful. I will be going back on Friday to teach some more and attune the kids to level 2. I met with some of the parents and they signed up indicating their interest in Reiki for Parents, so there may be a chance to teach a class after camp is over, and have some ongoing teaching opportunities with that particular center. It's a nice facility with good energy. They do lots of work with families, kids and teens, and this could be an excellent place for me to teach.

I also called another wellness center, which looked promising. I received a call back from them too, asking if I would like to apply to be one of their team. Today I went for an interview and applied. It looks like a great place to work and I could have lots of opportunities there to teach a variety of Reiki courses, including Distance Healing. The person I met with has many contacts and could help promote and bring people in for courses I would offer. The place is beautiful, situated overlooking a little running creek, and every room is inviting and warm. She was interested in my course materials, which I brought to show her, and is going to present my application to the Trustees. It is a nonprofit organization for Metaphysical study and exploration. It will be a week, at least, until I hear from them, but I feel pretty good about it.

Then, I spoke with the Program Director at the JCC here, who expressed interest in Reiki for Parents, and I sent her a course description. She is now on vacation.

So now I wait to see what will blossom from these efforts. I hope they all will become opportunities to teach and show people how amazing Reiki can be as a part of every day life. There is an element of quieting and believing that what is meant to work out will - since at this point much is out of my control. I put all of these things out there, and now I wait to see what will happen. This is the part where "letting go" is important, and having patience.

I thank the Universe for the opportunity to practice letting go and having patience. Many of you know that my dear husband has been looking for work since the end of April. He has many applications out there, and has had a few interviews. Things move very slowly, and it can be a trying process. But we are doing our best to stay positive and believe that all will work out for the best.

He is enjoying lots of time with the kids, meanwhile, and having the first summer "off" in many years. All the same, it could be easy to become anxious and wonder what the future will bring, and feel like things have to change soon or there will be problems ahead. While that is true, it doesn't do any good. It doesn't change things or make them work out sooner. So it doesn't pay to go there.

It also doesn't help any for me to worry and get intense over which teaching position, if any, will work out. Something will, and whatever it is, I'll learn something. Right now it seems, for my husband and myself, the lesson is having patience and letting go. We have to let go of anxiety, knowing we are making all of the effort we can to set things up, and have patience to see what is going to come of them - what will take root and grow into our next set of opportunities. The hardest part is the patience. Time marches on and tempts us to become anxious, worried about money - a very real issue - and yet worrying doesn't make money appear. Some might say worrying will block things from happening. I don't know, but I do know that it doesn't help. So we take turns reminding each other to enjoy the moment - be present and know that this is going to be a summer with Dad that the kids will always remember and cherish. And we remind each other to believe that things will work out in the right time. Encouraging each other when we need it helps keep us close together, supporting each other as spouses should do.

So the positives of patience and letting go are showing themselves in these ways.

The fruits of our efforts will grow in the right time.

Breathe, ground, let go, and have patience. Be in the moment.
The lessons of this summer.

Monday, July 27, 2009


Last weekend, my hubby and our 7 and 5 year olds and I went camping at the Starwood Festival. We stayed in a tent, sleeping on the ground in sleeping bags, camping rustic w/ no electricity. I had been invited to teach Distance Healing and Reiki for Parents, which I felt very honored about. The Starwood Festival is a Neo-Pagan clothing-optional festival which was a two hour drive from here. I had never heard of it before being invited, but spent some time on their website learning about it before we went. Needless to say, it was an experience.

Although we knew the clothing optional aspect, nothing quite prepares you for the reality until you see folks taking advantage of the optional aspect. We gave the kids a hasty lecture not to point and stare, and told them that after the festival, these same people were going home to put on clothes and go to work again.

As far as my classes went, well, one was scheduled at the same time as the ironic Church of the Subgenius lecture, so that meant that two people came while the rest of everyone went to that other event. Two interested people, yes, but not as many as I had anticipated (and prepared materials for). My second course had one participant. She, too, was interested in what I had to share, but I had hoped that more would've shown up. The weather was wet, rainy, and very muddy. I think that may have affected the turnout. So professionally speaking, it wasn't what I had anticipated.

There was a great set of concerts at night, though! Alex Bevan played, followed by the amazing Raquy and the Cavemen. We stayed until the kids begged us to put them to bed. Then we huddled in our sleeping bags while the all-night drumming went on just down the road from our tent. While drumming is cool, there was not a lot of sleep to be had that night.

We did enjoy hanging out and talking with other ...clothed...people during a potluck meal time, and over breakfast. The kids also had a blast, just being in a new environment.

We also came home a day early because huge thunderstorms with hail were being predicted and we didn't want to deal with the weather and more mud. It was a good call. We drove through three thunderstorms on the way home.

So how was it? As far as family experiences and getaway adventures go, pretty great. As far as professional contacts and teaching goes...less so. But the most telling part about the success of the weekend was when my husband said yesterday, "You know, if we go again next year, I could teach Morning Yoga."

So there ya go.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Trying Not to Try

In my last post, I was experiencing some computer difficulties, and mentioned that I would be spending the weekend away for some R&R, friends, family & energy work. I also mentioned that I had been feeling a little "stuck" lately and hoped that would resolve itself soon. Here's an update.

The computer issues are resolved. Glad about that!

I had a really great weekend, and began to get inspired about how to nurture my own intuitive development, how to encourage it to flourish and move ahead. One of the things I need to work on is grounding. Another is patience. Once I can increase my ability to ground my energy and be still, I will be more able to be patient and be open to receiving new insights. Sounds logical, I think. In practice, more challenging.

There's a concept of trying not to try that I need to get my mind around. (Or not, because thinking about it too hard could be considered "trying.") Being grounded, still and open requires letting go. What am I supposed to let go of? Effort, for one. So the first challenge is to simply BE.

BE in the moment. BE still. BE quiet. Not just quiet from talking, but quiet in my thoughts. That takes effort - (uh oh, not supposed to be making an effort. That's trying.) I have read that during meditation one should either 1) count to give your mind something to focus on, or 2) allow thoughts to pass like clouds floating by - noticing them but not giving them attention, and releasing them. It's easy for me to get distracted by my thoughts as one chains onto the next. I may have more luck with counting.

There's also the idea of visualizing. Imagining energy coming in the crown chakra, meeting energy that comes up from the Earth at the heart chakra. I can do this, and feel quite tingly when I do. Then one can release any anxiety or worry down into the Earth again. This is a technique for grounding. I need to make it a part of my day, several times a day.

I assign many of my Energy Healing Mentoring students a week of daily meditation practice which includes a meditation and a grounding exercise. They all come back to me reporting how valuable that week was, and that they intend to continue making meditation and grounding parts of their daily practice. I think I need to assign it to myself as well. It may be time for me to heed my own words here.

When giving Reiki healings, it is important for the practitioner to "get out of the way" of the energy, just allowing it to flow through him or her to the recipient. I find that if I think too hard about where it should go, or if I focus on trying to receive information I start to get a headache. It's a cue that I'm trying to hard. Don't try. Just BE. Let it flow. It will get where it needs to go, and information either will or won't come. It's important not to try to control it, but just BE the channel for the energy. It's kind of like being in one of those automatic car washes where the car is moved on a conveyor and you just sit in the car while it drives itself. You have to set the car there at the start of it, and then keep your hands off the wheel and let the mechanisms take over. If you try to steer or push on the gas or brake, you'll cause a problem with the process. I think same goes for Reiki healings. Set it up, then let it happen. It will work best if you don't try to make something happen.

So what I'm going to do this week is:
  • find time to meditate and ground each day
  • mindfully let go of thoughts, worries, and effort
  • quiet myself and be in the moment as much as possible
  • observe and note the changes that may happen
Wish me luck.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Crazy Days

The last few days have been kind of crazy. For two days, I had weird computer issues. First, Twitter suspended my account. Mine was one of a large number of accounts mistakenly suspended for no reason. Twitter corrected it and apologized but it brought to life how much I really rely on my involvement with Twitter. I have a lot of contacts there, students, friends, and colleagues. Suddenly not being able to access or post from my account was rather freaky. The good news is that my husband has a Twitter account, and we were able to get the word out to my friends that there had been a mistake. Their support was impressive, as they passed the word along via "Retweets."

Next, my gmail chat was hacked by a "middle man attack". The perpetrator actually butted into a chat I was having and started typing insulting things, making it look like it was coming from me! It was almost funny but it really wasn't because it was so confusing, and then I felt really out of control of the situation and even a little violated. I went through the process of logging out, changing my password from another computer, adding protection to my computer, purging all possible culprits from my computer, and emailing Google. It took several hours. There seems to be no lasting damage, except to my sense of well-being and security. I also changed passwords to most everything else I log into.

Then my car started acting funny. The seatbelt light on the dash started coming on even though I was wearing my seatbelt. It even beeped continuously, which was very annoying, all the way to and from my destination! I took it in for service. A wire was severed and it will be fixed next week sometime when the part comes in.

I went to use my cell phone and the number buttons wouldn't respond to my presses. Removing and resetting the battery solved it, but it was enough to make me wonder what was next.

Next was that when I got home, our Internet connection was down. I found out there was an outage in the area. It took a couple hours to come back.

None of these were big, horrible problems. But it really made me wonder just what is going on. Emotionally, I feel a little off too - like it's hard to say the right thing, and I'm sensitive to criticism from anyone. Is the world tilted at a strange angle?

I found out that there was a lunar eclipse early yesterday morning. Could that be the catalyst for this rash of incidents? I don't claim to have the answer. But I have some thoughts.

I know that I've become more sensitive to changes in energy around me. For instance, I can tell if someone is sending me energy, or even "feeling" or "scanning" my energy. Maybe as a result of an increase in sensitivity, the things around me also respond to changes in ...whatever energy shifts during times of astrological change (such as a lunar eclipse).

Or maybe it's just a series of events that has nothing to do with me or the cosmos. I don't really know.

All I know is that I'm trying to make sense of things, and putting them into a context helps somehow. Some people say "there are no coincidences" meaning that everything has a reason for happening, even if we don't get the reason yet.

I suppose that searching for the meaning behind my technological issues could lead one to say it's a message for me to get off the computer for a while. I did bike to the library with two of my kids today (during the Internet outage) and found a good book to read. (Awakening Intuition by Mona Lisa Schultz, M.D., Ph.D.) If I hadn't had the Internet issue, I might not have gone there and found this book. Perhaps there is a message in the book for me.

I have been feeling a little stuck lately, in terms of my own intuitive growth. This book could be where I find the means to move forward again. I'm taking a weekend vacation this weekend, to visit friends and my sister, get some R&R, do some energy work, and have a break. I think there are possibilities here too for adding some wind to my energetic sails. I'm going on my own - a rarety for me. (Big thanks to my awesome husband, who encouraged me to take this opportunity and will hold down the fort with the kids.)

What's the bottom line? I guess it's that I don't really know the reasons behind the craziness that attacked my technology and emotions lately. But I'm embracing the opportunities to grow that may have arisen from them.

It's the best I can do with what I've got!

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Alice's Awakening

People often ask me how I got here, how I became a passionate Reiki teacher. Here's the story, and links to a number of posts written at the time of the events I've described here. Please enjoy.

When I was a kid, I wanted to feel special. Doesn’t everyone want to feel special, endowed with something that stands out, a reason for being here? I used to read lots of books about characters with psychic powers or special abilities, and wish I was like that. But, I wasn’t.

I grew up with a liberal Jewish upbringing. I attended Hebrew School, became Bat Mitzvah and continued attending religious school through High School. I remember wishing for some feeling that what I was doing had a purpose. I wanted to feel a connection with God or at least something outside myself during services, prayers, or any time at all. I never did.

I didn’t dislike being Jewish. I felt, and still feel, connected with a People, culture, history, land, language, religion and traditions. I even went on after college to study Judaism further and received a Master’s degree in Jewish Studies. But through all of this study and search, something remained elusive: a spiritual connection. I wanted something I could feel and be sure about. I was fascinated by, skeptical of, and a little envious of those who had "spiritual confidence" - utter faith and belief. For me, experience was the only way I was going to get to that point. The experience wasn't there for me.

I felt the most frustration during formal worship services. There are group and individual prayers, standing, sitting, singing and reading in Hebrew. I knew them all, but nothing gave me the feeling I craved. I was seeking a certainty of something more, something beyond this existence. I would leave services feeling frustrated. I wondered why I had come, what others were getting out of the experience. I think I drove my husband kinda nuts with asking him what he got out of the experience. His answers didn't help me. He wasn't struggling the same way as I was.

When I was pregnant with my youngest child, a parent at my kids’ school asked me if I’d like to learn Reiki. I had no idea what that was. She explained that Reiki is an energy healing technique that could be helpful for reducing pregnancy discomforts. She had my attention, and I figured, “Why not?” I came to her house, where she taught me Usui Reiki level 1, and gave me my first attunement.

I was underwhelmed, but faithfully did my Reiki self healings throughout my pregnancy, and sometimes gave my infant daughter Reiki after she was born. When she was a year and a half old, I asked that same parent if there was more to Reiki than what I had learned. She said absolutely and asked if I would like to learn level 2. I agreed.

My level 2 Reiki attunement changed everything. As soon as my teacher attuned me to level 2, my hands began to tingle. When I deliberately thought “Reiki,” my hands tingled and warmed in response. When I put them on or above myself or someone else, the resulting sense of relaxation, warmth and peace were undeniable. My teacher taught me distance healing as well. Here was the defining moment of my spiritual awakening.

This was what I had been searching for as long as I could remember: a tangible response to spiritual energy. Learning Reiki created my spiritual connection. I began offering distance healing weekly to two friends, and their physical and emotional health improvements were amazing. One of my friends had a deep fear of medical procedures, and a health issue that was terrifying her. The Reiki healings helped her release this over time, and she became calmer. It turned out she didn't need the procedure she was expecting, as the issue had healed. The other friend was having physical therapy, and over the course of time, she experienced great improvements and didn't need to continue the therapy. I was amazed, delighted, and felt completely inspired. My friends were too, and both of them went on to learn Reiki for themselves.

This was more than a physical-spiritual connection now, this was the magic power I desired in my youth; a purpose for my existence. I had been transformed from a mere mortal to someone with healing power. Three months later, I became a Reiki Master Teacher.

I knew that if I could learn to do this, anyone could. It became my mission to teach others what’s right inside us all. I find great joy, satisfaction and validation in seeing others find their spiritual connection as I did, and knowing that they go on to pass this knowledge to others.

Every day, I receive emails from my students telling me how amazed they are at the way Reiki has improved their lives. Many of them go on to teach others, join the Distance Healing Network, and share this amazing energy with their family, friends, and those who need it. This keeps me going, reminds me daily of the power and reality of this connection to energy, and the immense power that everyone has within if they care to find it. It has become my purpose to help people discover this, and I've never felt so fulfilled, motivated, and grateful.

Love and gratitude to everyone who has been a part of this journey so far, and all who will join me yet.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

A Trickle or a Gush - Intuitive Development

One of the things I do for people is intuitive development mentoring. I would like to say outright that I am not the most intuitive person I know. Not at all. I'll also tell you that I was not born psychic, and I never had any sort of childhood intuitive abilities. I have never seen a ghost, spirit, guide, angel, or UFO. Many people who I mentor have much higher developed intuitive abilities than I do. They see visions, symbols, colors, angels, hear messages, are empathic, and more. So what the heck makes me qualified to mentor anyone in intuitive development? It's a great question. I've asked myself the same thing dozens of times. I think I started doing intuitive development mentoring before I knew the answer.

Maybe that fact in itself is part of the answer.

I think it all goes back to two things. First, I am a regular person. As I said, no natural psychic abilities, nothing particularly connected about me from the start. Nope. But I have been a seeker. I always wanted a spiritual connection. Then I learned Reiki. Boom. Things changed. When I say things changed, I don't mean it in an offhanded way. I mean...THINGS CHANGED! Developing a spiritual connection is a huge awakening. Because of Reiki, I have a physical reaction to spiritual energy. Something invisible is there, and I can feel it, tell it what to do, and it goes and does it. Seriously, that is major. Reiki took me, a spiritually disconnected regular kind of person, and showed me a dimension of life that I never knew was there. It was like stepping into color from black and white. The inspiration of this change in me taught me that others like me, regular people, could also experience the difference. I figured if I could do it, anyone could. So my journey started with Reiki.

But it didn't stop there.

I practiced Reiki every day. I found reasons to call the energy all day long. I gave Reiki to my plants, food, my kids, my parents, sent distance Reiki to friends, and joined the Distance Healing Network so I'd have more people to give Reiki to. I began to notice that the more I connected with energy, the more I was able to sense - my intuition was growing. I could tell where a person needed healing; if the person had pain or emotional issues, illness or trauma. I started to get a sense of it. I talked to others, found teachers, received attunements to help grow these connections. If you've read older entries in my blog (or you go back and have a look), you'll be able to follow all of this as it happened.

I realized that I could also help people do this. I wanted to be able to show people the way into the world of color. I started teaching Reiki. People emailed me with questions about how to sense energy, and I would give answers from my own experience. I came to realize that distance healing was something I had grown very comfortable doing, with validating results. I wanted to show people that they could do that too. So I started mentoring distance healing and put together an ebook of what I learned, in order to help others get as comfortable with distance healing as I am. The more I learned and discovered I could do, the more I wanted to show people so they could learn it too.

That brings me to the other reason I mentor intuitive development:

I'm a teacher. It's who I am. I have an ability to explain and show people how to understand things, and it works for this. I take each student from where they are, and show them how to get where they want to be. Often, ironically, they bring more to the table than I ever had. People are different, after all. Sometimes people come to me with experiences with angels, guides, or spirits, but they want to learn more about distance healing. I'm happy to give them the tools I use that make distance healing successful for me. Whatever they come with doesn't really matter as much as helping them reach the goals they have set for themselves. That's what I focus on - bridging the gap.

Along with being a teacher is something that I feel is one of my own intuitive gifts that has developed. I can get a sense of how to help a person achieve what they want to learn. I listen to (ok, more accurately, I read about) what the person's goals are. Sometimes the person tells me about what's challenging about reaching his/her goals. I quiet my thoughts. I get a feel for what the person said, and then I get an idea of how to move forward. I tell them. Sometimes this involves creating a curriculum of exercises to develop an ability. Sometimes it may mean suggesting an attunement designed to open the awareness of that particular area. Other times, it may mean sending healing to whatever is blocking the progress. Whatever it is, I seem to have an answer that makes sense and helps the person be successful.

My own intuitive growth has been a trickle, rather than a gush. I have seen some of my students experience an intuitive gush after Kundalini Reiki attunements. Suddenly, someone can channel information, or is seeing angels, feeling new and exciting sensations. I love it when people embrace these sudden gifts. Sometimes people become ungrounded or overwhelmed, and I help them adjust. No matter how fast or slowly one's intuition has developed, I think an important thing is to look back and see over time just how much growth and change has actually happened. This blog has been valuable for me in terms of doing that.

Always, though, intuitive development is a process. It may be a trickle, a gush, or some combination. But it happens when and how the person is ready and open to receiving it. And that may be the most important lesson of all.


Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The Weight of the Word

In my other professional life, I write content and rules for games. Board games, mostly - social party games involving cards, questions, and friendly competition. I learned through having this kind of job that every word is important. Words for cards, questions and rules must be chosen carefully in order to be clear about how to play the game, and the meaning of each question. I really notice when I come across a game with poorly written rules or cards.

When I was in graduate school, I used to take Biblical text study courses. Studying Torah (Bible) is another very detailed word-based discipline. Every word is thought to be significant, and we would often debate why one word may have been chosen over another, and read about what the great Rabbinic commentators' thoughts were about these choices. Detailed text study gave me a profound respect for the process of choosing words carefully.

When I learned Reiki, I became fascinated with the studies of Masaro Emotu. He determined that words have energy. Positive energy and negative energy are emitted by spoken and written words. The words absorb the intention in which they are spoken or written and emit that energy to others, water, or where the words are directed. Emotu's experiments with water are truly inspiring. Some of them involved writing the word "Peace" on a piece of paper and affixing it to a container of water, and writing the words "You Fool" on another piece of paper affixed to a different container of water. The water came from the same original source. After a few hours, droplets of the water were quickly frozen and examined under a microscope. The water with the word "Peace" had grown beautiful detailed crystals. The water with the words "You Fool" had disjointed, chaotic pieces of broken crystals, and a muddy appearance. Other words were also used, such as "Hope," "Thank You," "Despair," and "War," with similar and predictable results. You can learn more about Emotu's various experiments with water here. What moves me the most is considering the implications that this experiment shows of how our word choices can affect others. Our bodies, the air we breathe, and our environment are all permeated with water. If energy, whether via words, music, or Reiki, make profound and measurable changes to that water, consider how that concept could become a means of making a positive change. Our words, thoughts, and intentions are at work improving the quality of water that is within others and the world, bringing about healing, beauty, and love. We are so much more powerful than we realize!

I regularly give healings with and teach a method of Reiki called Kundalini Reiki. I absolutely love this Reiki for its powerful and direct way to connect with the energy. It involves no symbols; needs no hand positions. You intend for the energy to affect an issue, person, or goal, and it flows. For me, it works instantly, and it seems to do the same for my students. When I'm teaching Kundalini Reiki, I use a manual. I did not write this manual, but found it after exhaustive research on the Internet. It's not the one I was given when I learned Kundalini Reiki. Let me explain.

Kundalini Reiki is a variant of the "original" Reiki, Usui Reiki Ryoho. It was channeled and developed by Ole Gabrielsen, and English is his second language. As well, he wrote the manual for someone who was already familiar with Reiki, probably Usui Reiki, someone who understands the basic concepts of calling in (or activating) energy, distance healing, and what energy healing is about. Therefore, these things are not covered much in the manual. I was fine learning from the manual provided, as I already was at Master/Teacher level of Usui Reiki when I took up Kundalini Reiki. However, I was interested in finding a more explanatory and better organized manual when I decided to teach this method of Reiki. I began my research.

I found another manual that had the addition of a Table of Contents, and some revised explanations for some of the healings, while retaining most of the original content. This was the best one I found and it was the one I started using for teaching. It's still not as explanatory as I would like.

The more experience I have teaching Kundalini Reiki, the more I find myself writing longer and longer emails to supplement this manual when I send the manual to my students. This is because even this manual is not very well written. Some of the explanations are incomplete, the wording is unclear, and I've found that it can be downright confusing in many places! As their teacher, I like to give my students the best chance for understanding what they will learn. My deep love and respect for this Reiki system drives me to keep teaching it, despite the challenges of working with the manual and trying to explain via email what it should say instead of what it does say. Even so, it's frustrating at times!

I know that I need to, and will, write a new and improved Kundalini Reiki manual. I owe it to my students, and I know that they, in turn, will find it useful when they want to teach Kundalini Reiki to others. When I do, I will mindfully select each and every word. I know that words have weight, energy, connotations, and divulge important information. I also know that the manual I write will be passed along to future generations of Reiki students who can benefit from learning this amazing Reiki modality by having a manual that is worthy of the method. I also think that a manual needs to respect the person reading it, meeting that person where he is and taking him to a place of deep and complete understanding of the method. It's a challenging task, and necessary.

Completing a new Kundalini Reiki manual is on my short list of priorities.

Meanwhile, I will continue to offer as complete guidance as I am capable of, and I appreciate my students' willingness to see the value in the method beyond the quality of the materials currently available. My individual attention and complete email support are key components of my teaching methods.