Sunday, March 23, 2008

I'm Seeing the Difference - or Not Really SEEING.

This weekend, I've had some nice time to myself to work on studying and practicing learning Chios Healing. I have to say that I'm finding it much harder than Reiki.

Reiki came naturally to me, and it doesn't require any special exercises or abilities. (Maybe that's why it came naturally to me- ha ha ha). I was attuned, and I could immediately feel the difference, channel energy, and benefit from doing self-treatments and sending Reiki. This is especially true for me in terms of Reiki level two. The night I was attuned to Reiki two, I sent a distance Reiki treatment for the first time, and I could feel it working. My Reiki intuitive sense has been developing naturally, through practice, and the people who request Reiki of me feel and benefit from the energy I send them. About 98% of the people I've sent distance Reiki to have felt it when I sent it, and have reported how much better they feel. I've been confident enough and grateful enough for the ability to do this to become a volunteer with the Distance Healing Network. I continued and took the Reiki Master Teacher level course. And, I started this blog out of being inspired by the way Reiki has changed my life for the better.

Chios Healing is different. I feel like I am missing something I should have. Maybe I'm not a visual person by nature. Maybe that is required, or else a person has to work to develop it. I'm the type of person who has to work, I guess. Because being attuned didn't bring about the same changes in me that Reiki did. This isn't automatic, or it seems, a natural method for me. I'm doing brain and eye "workouts" to try to develop the ability to see auras and visual impurities in the aura. I'm doing yoga breathing and looking at optical illusions to try to develop my "intuitive sense" that I seem to have in my hands but not in my eyes or mind's eye. I am supposed to, according to the Chios level 2 manual, be able to look at a person, and get an intuitive sense of where their energy field is in need of adjusting due to leaks, tears, blockages, or low energy. I am not there. I'm trying too hard, I can't hear my intuition, I can't feel any information getting through. Even my hands, my greatest Reiki tools, are not performing well for me with Chios. When I use them, I can sense the location of the chakras, and get a sense of their activity. This is helpful for me to feel if one is less active (blocked maybe) than the others. But when I call the Chios, and use the symbols (another visualizing/internalizing procedure), I'm not sure about the feel of the energy in or leaving my hands. And the people I've been practicing on - my husband and oldest daughter, have reported that they feel "a little warm" but not much else. This feels for me like I'm a couch potato trying to work my body into shape to model bikinis. Can you sense my frustration? I was under the impression that since I'm comfortable with channeling energy with Reiki, that learning a different energy healing modality would be a natural extension of my energy healing technique, and be...well, easier to learn.

I'm not a person who quits if something is hard. I guess I'm just surprised that Chios Healing is so hard for me, even after being attuned. I'm feeling pretty thick, actually, like a brick, and I'm sure that feeling isn't helping me open up either. I'm probably blocking my own learning, which is also frustrating. I thought that if I got my active mind out of the way, that my intuitive sense would be able to do this. But it isn't "just happening" like Reiki did for me.

Okay, enough whining. I guess I have to do the exercises and start from scratch, as if I'm someone who has never worked with Universal Life Energy before. My teacher is trying to help me. She pointed me to websites for helping a person develop auric sight, and I am working the exercises diligently. She also emailed me more exercises, such as the yoga breathing ones, to help me get my right brain more open to hearing intuitive messages. She has sent me extra color attunements, which I felt happening, but I'm still stuck here like a person with no experience whatsoever. Wow what a rant I'm letting loose.

Advice for how to do this better is welcome.

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