The Summer Stretch

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This is our first summer living in Maryland. I truly love living here. I love our neighborhood, our house and yard that is just the right size for our big family, and how near we are to a multitude of activities ranging from Washington, DC museums to a day on the beach. 

My kids are growing. My oldest will begin High School in just a month. I'll have kids in three different schools this year, also a first. They're developing their own interests, and with them, a desire to explore.

Which means that this summer, my kids are involved in a myriad of activities, and I'm their primary transportation method. 

My work time has been carved into pieces around driving to and from day camps, lessons, and social engagements. In between, I've been planning meals, and trying to discourage the kids who are home between activities from arguing or making a mess. Plus, when kids are home and I'm trying to work, inevitably, they want my attention. They want to talk about their dream last night, or the video they saw, or what their friend texted to them this morning. It's hard to ask for silence, because I'm also keenly aware of how fast they're growing. I care about their thoughts; I want to be there for them. I don't want to be "that mom" who isn't really listening, isn't really present for my kids during this important time in their growth. 

I miss the different daily rhythm of the school year, with it's quiet mornings and early afternoons before the kids return home with homework and stories of their day, followed by dinner, planning for the next day, and then quiet work or teaching time again. 

Yes, I am enjoying more recreational time with my family. That's what summer is for too, right? Reconnecting, appreciating good weather and different activities that the school year doesn't leave time for. That's good stuff. I'm grateful for the flexibility to choose my schedule and manage my own work time. 

But, on the other hand, I have a need and a desire for silence - to meditate, or be open to the new ideas that help me more forward. I need focus and time to be productive. My work doesn't stop when the school year does. I just have to fit it in differently. 

I'm finding myself pretty tired out, and sometimes frustrated at the interruptions, at leaving work unfinished and having to come back to it, and at the ways my energy has been pulled in many directions all day long.

I know that it's temporary. The summer seems to go by faster than the rest of the year. The winter feels at least twice as long to me. And, I do love being outside when the weather is warm. I'm trying to breathe it all in, but even that can feel like a lot to remember when there are so many things on my todo list.

Does your summer feel like this? Can you relate to my situation?

In a moment of frustration last night, I told my husband I need a vacation from the kids and all this. He said he understands. 

I'm going to take one in two weeks. It's called Caregiver Relief Retreat. And that's exactly what I need. Even though I'll be leading this retreat with my business partner, Connie, and some great colleagues, I know I'll also get some benefit from the change in setting, change in rhythm, and a little energetic reset. 

We've been planning this retreat for six months. It's in mid-Ohio, at Mohican State Park Retreat and Conference Center. It's going to provide the kind of break that any caregiver needs - I'm talking about moms, nurses, teachers, social workers, and so many more. There will be guided meditation, yoga, nature walks, and energy healing sessions. Connie's bringing her aura camera, and we'll do some readings and intuitive fun stuff in the evening. We'll remind participants and ourselves the importance of this kind of break for self-care,  because ultimately, it makes it easier to go back to giving care to those who need us. 

There are still some spots open. If you or anyone you know needs this break as much as I do, please come, and encourage them to come too. Better yet, bring them with you. Everyone is more willing to take time for self care if a friend invites them. Just click the flyer below. Let's do this together.

Self-care is so important, and the most neglected of all. Even those who understand, preach, and teach the importance of self-care can be the worst at taking the time for their own. I hope that people will come on this retreat with me, so we can all remind each other, as we model what we teach by how we live. 

Peace and sunshine.

The Pain in the Process

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Since August, I've been part of a holistic healing team providing energy and other holistic support for the nicest woman, Lisa. I was asked, along with my good friend and Quantum-Touch practitioner, Ernie Betz, to be part of a team to help her. We all volunteer on various days at 11 am, and go to her house to offer our services. Lisa is 44 years old. She has four children the same ages as mine. She has a doctorate in nursing and worked in a hospital. Her kids are home schooled. She has stage four cancer in her breast and hip bone, and the medical doctors gave up.

Ernie and I have been seeing Lisa weekly on Fridays since August. When we first went, she was very frail, in a hospital bed, and had been unable to even sit up for five weeks. We didn't know if we'd be seeing her the next week or hearing of her passing. Two weeks later, she was sitting and had more energy. Each week, there were more improvements - miraculous and exciting. Most of the summer, she was getting physical therapy to walk again, and the hospital bed disappeared into the attic. She was dressing herself, could stand, and was getting around in a wheel chair. We would talk about her feelings and her progress for about half an hour, and share energy healing the second half. We laughed and shared stories about parenting, healing, and all kinds of things. I attuned her and her husband to Reiki and she read my book. I also shared other books with her, and we gave her healing stones. I've never been part of such an incredible process.

They are a beautiful family. A couple weeks ago, I even brought my kids to play with theirs, and they had a blast, all getting along and really having fun together.

For the past month, though, she has started to have setbacks. She's been having trouble breathing, swelling in the feet and legs, less energy, and difficulty sleeping. They've tried adjusting things including diet, herbal supplements, aromatherapy, homeopathics, etc. Nothing seems to be making a difference.

I have to admit I am having a hard time.

Intellectually, and as a teacher and Reiki practitioner, I know my role. My role is to provide energy. I offer support. The rest is not up to me. It never was. The good, the bad, any results at all are not mine. My feelings are totally incidental to the process. I need to just be grateful for the opportunity to serve. And I am. So very much so that I can't describe the endless depth of it.

But today, she seemed barely there. She hardly spoke. She fell asleep a little. She held a couple ice chips in her mouth to counter the dryness of struggling to breathe despite the oxygen tube just inside her nose. She asked us to help her receive the energy, because she couldn't feel it today.

Her husband is the sweetest, most attentive, positive person I've ever met. Their family has lots of support - meals brought in, people helping with the daily necessity of living, parenting, chores and bills. He has not left her side in weeks.

I am having a hard time.

"I have no right to have a hard time," my snarky voice says. "I'm coming home to a healthy family. I'm healthy. I leave after the hour or two I'm there and go back to my life."

But this experience brings up memories of sitting with my mother-in-law during her final three days as she floated in and out and struggled to breathe. I felt helpless then. I feel helpless now. I know, yes, that the energy I'm providing and my presence is helping. But she is so young. She's my age. Her kids are my kids' ages. This seems so wrong. "Not that I have the right to judge what's wrong or right for another," my snarky voice chimes in. "Yeah, I know," I answer. But it sucks. It's too familiar and I don't want it to be.

I'm also acutely aware that if the healing team hadn't been there, she very likely wouldn't have shared the Fall, much less Christmas or New Year's with her family. And I am grateful for that time. But couldn't all of our combined effort have done MORE? Did I miss something? Was there ANYTHING else we could have done to help? I just don't know.

I don't even know if I'll be able to see her again next week. The thought is like a punch in the gut, as aware as I've been this whole time that it's always been a possibility. Is it even possible that she could have a second turnaround? I just don't know. And, I remind myself, it isn't up to me.

Part of this role is being able to let go of expectations and just be present. That is healing and that is helping. Any agenda, expectations, hopes, celebrations or disappointments just don't belong in the equation. THIS IS HARD!! It's hard because I love them. It's hard because I care and I DO want her to recover; how can I not want this? What kind of person would I be if I was totally detached?

I went back and read my posts I had written (linked above) when we were with my mother-in-law during her final days. It helps to read the comments and also revisit my thoughts and feelings about life, dying, and coping.

I guess that part of life is being aware of the wholeness of it all-- The whole process: beginning and end, living, learning, and also moving on. When it comes to passing, first we do this as a witness, and eventually it's our turn. The best we can do is to just be present in every moment, for every moment we're given, and experience it. That's what life is - the experience.

Thank you for allowing me to share. All of you who read this blog are part of this shared experience.
If you would, please send a thought, prayer, or a stream of healing energy to Lisa's family and all who care for her.

Namaste.

Healer, Be Healed

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This weekend, I had the blessing of going to spend the day with Connie Dohan, one of my mentors and wonderful, caring teachers. She gave me several energy healing sessions, read my cards, drew my angels and those of my children and husband, took a picture of my aura with her aura camera, taught me about crystals, and gave me advice on promoting my Reiki teaching practice. Her husband nurtured us with home cooked food. We took walks together in the spring sunshine. It was a very healing and rejuvenating day and one I needed very much. I'm so grateful for her place in my life.

I learned a lot too. I get very caught up in helping others, taking care of my family, teaching, sending Reiki, and working on various writing projects. I'm spread pretty thin. It's okay because I like to be busy, but I, like many others, forget to take time to receive the energy that can revive me and restore my balance. Things that bother me just sit in my energy, waiting to be taken care of. Sometimes they wait a long time. In spending a day receiving healing, insight, guidance, fresh air and good food, I realized how much I had been needing this replenishing.

As I became aware of my baseline, and the shift that took place after each healing session, I was made aware of just how important receiving healing is. Not just for me, but if the people I share Reiki healing with are receiving this kind of powerful clearing, then what I do is not only important, but really needed. Since I became a Reiki practitioner, I believed in the benefits of Reiki. But experiencing it for myself in such a direct way was a very strong reminder of why I do this for others.

Energy practitioners are not exempt from the need to receive healing. In fact, all who offer energy healing to others should also receive healing from others on a regular basis. I'm not only a Reiki teacher, but also a working mom of four. Everyone falls into the category of being able to benefit and really needing the power of energy healing to help release the energetic sludge that accumulates as we wear so many hats. I didn't even realize that I was in such ragged shape until I felt the difference afterward.

I want to mention that I do daily self-Reiki healing at least once per day. But it's been a while since I received Reiki from someone else in several powerful sessions, and wow, did I ever need it. I feel renewed and much more aware of my emotional, spiritual and physical state.

The readings helped me see my path more clearly, and confirmed what I'm doing well, and what I need to strengthen. They helped me see my children and husband as being cared for and loved by the angels around them. They helped me connect more where I had felt doubts.

Let me mention that I believe that we are all capable of learning to help each other in this life. Connecting to Life Force Energy through learning Reiki or another energy healing modality enables us to care for ourselves and to care for others. We are also able to receive healing from others who know this too. I teach Reiki because the more people who can do this, the better our world can be. I'm always in awe of how easy Reiki is to learn, and how life-changing it can be.

Connie is seriously wonderful, and that is due in part to the fact that she decided to listen, strengthen her intuitive gifts, and nurture her own connection to Spirit. She fully embraced this path and now teaches and nurtures others who wish to do the same. I'm blessed to know her. I'm also inspired to continue moving ahead, offering healing and teaching to others, and nurturing them. Receiving energy refreshed my gift of being able to give.

So this lesson was one on receiving, but also on the power of giving. I'm grateful to share this lesson with you here.

Reiki Here and Waaaaaay Over There

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Thanks to my blog, people from places all over the world contact me asking for distance Reiki. Sometimes it's out of curiosity, sometimes out of need, and I always try to oblige. I enjoy helping, and turning people on to Reiki.

Weirdly, this last week, I've had two separate requests for distance Reiki from Singapore, which is across the world from here. Weird, because, consider the odds of that... And I really love that Reiki goes wherever it's sent, irrespective of distance or time. Like making a call on a cell phone, but better!

Also, of course, I seem to be compelled to talk about Reiki at every opportunity. And last night I had the chance to give a little 3-minute sample treatment to an adult at the school where I teach. She loved it and asked for more, and for convenience sake, we decided I would send her a distance Reiki treatment on Sunday night. I had to come up with a fee - this was a professional request! - and I said $20 for 30 minutes. Distance Reiki treatments are shorter than in-person ones. She said that cost was more than reasonable, and so okay, we're on!

I have the feeling that eventually I will be purchasing a Reiki table (massage table - same thing I think but no hole at the head part) and I've been thinking of getting some of those pretty Japanese screens and setting up a Reiki space in my basement (it's carpeted and finished, but would need some rearranging to do this). But there's plenty of time for all this, I just imagine it over the horizon, like maybe by the late summer or fall.

Tomorrow morning I'm going to do some volunteer Reiki at the Sophia Wellness Center at Ursuline College where I took my Reiki Master class last weekend. People come there for free Reiki treatments during the Reiki clinic hours, and volunteer Reiki healers give Reiki treaments to them. I'm happy for the chance to get more hands-on experience with Reiki and hope to be able to round out my experiences. I think that hands-on Reiki will also give me different energetic experiences than distance Reiki, and could help in my own energy healing growth as well.

Love & Light

Hands on Feet

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On Tuesday, a friend who wanted to learn more about Reiki came over so I could have the welcome opportunity to talk about Reiki to someone who actually wanted to hear me talk about it. I talked all about how I came to learn about Reiki, and how it's become such a large and involved journey in my life. Before she left, I gave her a short hands-on treatment. That was interesting. I started with one hand on top of her head, and the other in the center of her shoulder blades, just below her neck. I felt lots of tingles there, but she didn't feel much. Then I moved my hand on her back lower, and my hand that was on her head hovered lightly over her stomach. She reported that she felt tingles in her feet and up to her knees. I stayed that way for a while, and then put my hands on her knees, and finally on her feet. She felt the Reiki very strongly there, and was very interested in the sensations she was feeling. I was glad to have had the chance to introduce her to Reiki. She works with patients, and may be interested in having Reiki attunement as a tool to help comfort her patients.

Also, Tuesday night I was teaching my class, and my previously skeptical student, the one I sent distance Reiki and he was astonished to have felt it, asked me to give him hands-on Reiki during break. So I did give him Reiki on his head and shoulders, while he sat in a chair. He, too, exclaimed that he felt lots of energy in his feet. He had sore feet and legs from running on his treadmill at home earlier. I think I've made my point.

I have been posting about taking the Reiki ART level next weekend, the 29th. I may have the opportunity to take the whole Reiki Master Level, offered all three days of the weekend. I asked the teacher about doing any kind of barter of writing/editing services to offset some of the tuition cost, and she is open to it, and wants to speak with me. Probably tomorrow we'll figure it out. Also, I have to deal with a small Sunday conflict as I have to lead a rehearsal from 12-2 pm that day, but I hear that she gives a long lunch break, so it might still be ok. I'm going to ask all my questions when I talk to her. But I think if I have the chance to do the whole level, I should go for it.

And, regarding the jobs that came after I sent Reiki asking for them: out of the blue, one of them offered me 50% more money per article than originally agreed, and I even asked if it was a mistake, and they said no, it's correct. So I'm getting a great rate for writing Internet articles, and there should be a steady stream of assignments coming through at least June. This could add up to half the income I need to make in a month - a sizable contribution!

I decided that after I take the Reiki class, I'll see how I feel, and take some time to adjust to the new level of Reiki. Then I'll sign up for the Chios healing distance class, which should take about 6 weeks. I think Chios will be a very strong compliment to Reiki. I also plan, a year from now, to take Karuna. I want to have the ability to channel different energy frequencies for the strongest, most effective healing possible.

I've tried using some Theta Healing techniques, and the person I tried it on remarked on the difference in the Reiki this time - like she was under a heavy, warm, comforting blanket of energy. I'm going to continue to experiment. I like having different techniques to try to make the energy healing process as effective as it can be.

Peace, Love & Light.